Thursday, June 18, 2009

Big Green Scary Monster!

So last night everyone went to bed. We did our nanight routine with keegan. Brush teeth, wash face, go pee, talk about our day,read Bible stories, hugs and kisses, then we leave his room. Nothing different what so ever. Cameron had his rice cereal and nursed and he fell asleep. Now Brian says goodnight.

i am still awake on the computer. WEll not ON the computer, but playing Farmtown on Facebook.

(Before i get into what happend last night... let me tell you that every night between 3-4 am Keegan comes into our room and crawls into bed. I usually put him back in his room, or if im too exhausted i wake up brian to do it. Sometimes he stays sometimes hes back in around 5)

SO....

Keegan went to bed about 10 pm. he went to bed late because he took a nap late and woke up at 6 pm.

Its about 11:30. Im harvesting some crops and i hear keegans door open... Then shut. (i smile because even in the middle of the night he always closes the door behind him). I have the light on out here and he usually comes to our room through the bathroom (which is like a hall from his end to our end, it has 2 doors). So i quietly say... "Keeeeegan". So I dont startle him.
Well he never came out.

So i finished what i was doing and i went into his room. and when i opened his door he was kind of standing at his door and he looked soooo scared. he had his hands in his mouth and trying not to cry. I said.. keegan whats the matter? he says Scary monster mommy!

I asked him where and he points to his door and hes constantly looking at the ceiling and his door. i try to reassure him that there are no monsters and that hes okay. I asked him if he wanted to pray and he said yes. So we prayed together and then i got another night lite from the kitchen and put it in his room. I had him talk about his day a little and then we sang twinkle twinkle. he wanted to sleep in my room but i told him i had to sleep in there with daddy. and he asked me if i could sleep in his room. I told him that hes okay and that i had to sleep in my room. he said that he was scared of his room and didnt like his room.

So i figured he was gonna end up in my bed anyway at 3 am so i took the monitor and slept in keegans room with him.

This morning he woke up and he was talking to me and said. mommy there was a big scary monster!!
(i said okay ill try to get him to talk about what he thought he saw)
he tells me that it was a big scary green monster.
i say.. oh it was green?
and he says.. YEA! and it went (he scowls his eyes mean and opens his mouth really wide) like that to me. and it ran up fast to the sky!

EEWW. i instantly got the shivers. I told him that there are no such things as monsters. and he takes me to the window and tells me that it ran up to the sky out there. see mommy?

We dont let keegan watch anything scary. but he DOES have a very very big imagination.
Looks like mommy will be battling a big green scary monster for a while.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Quitting Soda Day 1

Yesterday i drank the last can of Dr.Pepper from the 24 pack. I said.. okay this is it. No more soda for me. Its time to get healthy!

My son was just diagnosed with EE (which means his body pretty much attacks food and makes white blood cells called eosinophils build up in his esophogus) and he needs to avoid Chicken, Fish, dairy and corn (which also means corn syrup) and cutting back on wheat. he is already super allergic to eggs and peanuts.

So i figure, if he has to give up his favorite drink, Milk, and other foods i can cut out something thats not even good for me. something IM addicted to.

If i was able to quit smoking i am able to do this right?

haha.. oh man. Its 10:53 am and i am already dying. I am DEAD beat tired. i know by the end of the day i'll have a caffiene withdrawl headache. im starting to feel it build up as we speak. I know the first 5 days are going to be the hardest. but im hopeing that drinking juice when i want soda will help. And i hope that keeping in mind that Keegan doesnt have a choice, now either do i. I will simply put it in my head that i CANNOT have soda. just plain and simple.

Wanna know how addicted i am? EVERYDAY i have at LEAST 4-5 cans of soda. One day all i drank was soda and it ended up being 8 cans! MY GOODNESS!!

I am breastfeeding too and im beating myself up because i know that Cameron most likely shouldnt be getting caffiene. I had to cut myself off from caffiene for the first 3 months he was born because i swear that was part of his tummy issues. (we later found out that it was dairy, but im sure it contributed).

i have 3 very good reasons to quit. For myself, my waistline is growing my IBS doesnt enjoy it. too much sugar and calories and i know im addicted to caffiene. For Keegan because he cant have food he loves because it can kill him. and for Cameron, because what i eat and drink , he gets.

oh goodness this is going to be hard. HAHA i am sooo tired already. I am dragging and finding it hard to keep my eyes open. It will be interesting to see how long it will take for my body to actually remember how to function and be naturally awake instead of caffiene induced.

i havent had any real cravings for it yet. i just mostly feel exhausted.

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWN

Friday, June 12, 2009

Do you need some help out?

So today i had to make a grocery store run. You may think, oh harmless and easy right?
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Most of the time the grocery shopping is the easy part. Its getting myself and both kids ready, in the car. Then its unloading them into the cart. Deciding what is best for keegan to do, walk or mandatory sit in the cart. Then its unloading etc etc.
Today i had quite the experience.
I try my best to park right next to the return cart area. There are usually several in the parking lot. Getting right next to one cuts some frustration down for sure. We get out and there just so happens to be a cart with the race car attached to the front of it, and Keegan wants to drive it. Sounds like a good idea. i have a small list so that will make up for the smaller cart, Keegan wont be running around and he'll be occupied. And today im going to try to put Cameron into the cart and buckle him in with NO car seat this time. One more step to less stress. that thing is so heavy with him in it! LOL
Everything is going smoothly, i get my Clorox wipe from the front of the store wipe down the steering wheels, the handle bar for Cameron, and off we go shopping!

Keegan is having a blast. (last time we tried the car thing, he wanted to walk instead because that's when we didn't make him sit in the cart anymore) HE sat in there the whole time driving. People were commenting on how cute he was driving and lots and lots of smiles. Cameron was content sucking on his thumb and playing with the teether toy i had attached to the cart with a few teething rings.
I'm at my last isle getting juicy juice for Keegan. I put them next to Cameron. He grabs the juice like a little koala and starts gnawing on the cap. hes talking and babbling and loving on that top. Drool is pouring down the side of the bottle. ew, but hes happy, no harm no foul.

I'm headed up to the cashier and i decide i should probably take the bottle away from him and wipe it off. A little courtesy for our cashier right?
As soon as i detach him from the bottle he starts to cry and scream! (this is the new thing lately esp if he really likes something).
I'm in line and there a few kids ahead of us with their mom. About 5 and 10 years old. They are covering their ears looking at Cameron. Great. I have the noisy kid that everyone walks by thinking.. for heaven sake shut that kid up.
So i pick him up hoping to calm him down. This isn't working. He now has snot down to his chin. He is crying SO hard that now his eyes and his face are all blotchy and red. I get him to calm down a bit.
Now its my turn to unload my groceries onto the belt.
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Crap. this stupid cart is so big that i cant get in between the stand and the cart to unload my groceries. Not to mention I'm holding this very unhappy baby on my hip. So slowly I'm trying to do this. The cashier is ringing things up faster than what I'm unloading. I'm knocking batteries off the stand behind me with my rear.
A lady with the red jacket that screams CUSTOMER SERVICE looks at me with a smile. Would like me to unload that for you hun? Usually i have a hard time swallowing my pride and I'll just say, no thanks Ive got it. This time i didn't even hesitate. i jumped out of her way, knocking off more batteries that she picked up and she unloaded the rest for me. "there ya go! have a nice day" she says with a smile. Oh thank you so much! what a relief.
Well usually the walk from the end of the belt to the cashier is quite easy and out you go after you pay. not today of course.
Now I'm trying to push this extended cart that is hard to steer down this tiny isle with one hand. For PETE SAKE! I'm ramming the other side of the isle trying to get it to go straight and its not budging. I'm starting to feel my face get warm and I'm now avoiding any sort of eye contact with anyone around me.
My sweet handicapped bagger now has to come over and pick up the front end of the cart (with keegan in the car part) move it over and guides it to his end. WHAT AN INCONVENIENCE I AM TO EVERYONE TODAY!
i still haven't fixed my pin on my debit card so i have to run it as credit. This means i have to sign. And i still have a baby in my arms. That part wasn't too bad at all.
She asks me, Do you need any help out today? I chuckle in my head, is it really that obvious? I am still avoiding eye contact. "No thanks, i got it." I'm sure they thought i was out of my mind. I strap Cameron back into the cart, which now makes a quiet baby a crying baby. But as soon as i start to walk he calms down. At this point i found myself letting out a sigh of relief.
we get to the car unload the groceries and buckle the kids in.
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Finally that is over. Lets go home.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

It cant get better than this

As the boys get older, as more things come our way, things dont always tend to get easier or harder. they just keep getting better. Even when i dont think its possible. Every hard time we've come across, as a family, has only brought us closer together. Every good time we share, makes us love eachother more. My family something that i'll always cherish. I thank God everyday for my wonderful husband and my boys. Things arent going to be easy. Especially with Keegans diagnosis of EE, and how it will affect our lives and our family. Food wont be the center of our family time. We have to not focus on food which is hard because everything we do in America is centered around it. celebrations, get togethers, holidays, birthdays,etc, you eat at these things.

the next hurdle will be Cameron. Knowing if he has it too or not. Will it make it harder or easier?

We just have to trust in God and really enjoy every moment we have.

one more thing to bring us closer together.

Nap Time is the Greatest

I love my kids i really do. But when nap time is here, and both kids are asleep, its my little piece of heaven. No one is whining. No one is crying. No one is screaming. No one is pulling my hair, or tugging my pants. No toys are being thrown. all i hear is the sound of Camerons stuffy nosed breathing through the monitor and the fan above me whirling around.

ahhh. Nap time.. how i love thee.